December 2022 | Reflect — Oceana Mariani

NOTE: This was originally published as part of my newsletter in December 2022. Subscribe to my newsletter to receive the next Om Letter direct to your inbox once a month.

In the bustle of Winter festivities it’s easy to forget to cherish these final few days of the year. If we place our ear to the Earth, these darker winter days can offer us a sanctuary for reflection and stillness. The Sanskrit term apana comes to mind which originally translated as ‘exhalation,’ but its meaning has expanded over the centuries to encompass all ‘energy that travels downwards.’ Think of how trees draw their sap deep down into their trunks to minimise effort and protect themselves from the harsh conditions of the winter months. Then, as temperatures begin to rise so does that sap, eventually unleashing the bountiful colours of Spring.

I’m not exactly hibernating down here in the Canary Islands, but I’ve allowed myself some time to retrospect. Over the past year I’ve taught ten different styles of yoga or meditation for 445 hours to over 5,000 people across nine different spaces in London. After five years, 2022 finally pushed me past the 1,000 teaching hours benchmark which, according to Yoga Alliance, officially makes me an ‘experienced’ teacher. Whatever we may think of these arbitrary titles and accolades, I have felt a shift over the past year.

Mostly I found myself trusting more in the well of knowledge that I’ve built up over sixteen years of practice. The need to stick with ‘the plan’ has been replaced by the freedom to improvise. Along with the positives I also have to acknowledge that I got caught up in my own enthusiasm for teaching in person once again and overextended myself. This left me with little to no time for my own practice and, come November I felt pretty drained.
I’ve slowly been building towards a more balanced relationship between the work I love and, the personal practice that shapes my teaching. This has meant creating more pockets of stillness - opening up the time it takes for creativity to emerge and, for deeper learning to take place.

I’ve let go of some of my public classes and decided to shift my Autumn retreat into the following Spring. Prioritising quality over quantity.
Since stepping onto the teachers mat at the front of the yoga studio, I have never been able to look back on any previous year without feeling a boundless sense of gratitude towards those of you that have chosen to spend so much of *your* hard-earned spare time with me, either in person or online.
One of the studios I work for recently forwarded a piece of anonymous feedback to me that highlighted the sense of community this person felt by joining that class regularly.

As much as I’d love to take credit for that feeling of togetherness, part of what makes yoga so different from so many other forms of movement is that every class is informed by what each person brings onto their mat with them. Those who show up week after week share their background, experiences, knowledge and kindness with me, which in turn feeds back into how I facilitate that class. So if you were part of that wonderful bunch of people then thank you for enriching every moment of the past 12 months for me and those around you, often without knowing it. I look forward to spending another year in your good company.

Lastly, if you have received this and haven’t done so already, I invite you to pause today. Take to a pen and paper. Reflect on the journey this past year has taken you on and let yourself enter the dream of winter to envision the incoming year.

With love,

OM x

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